Is the movie worth your buck?

The film ‘One By Two’ is a mocktail and here’s its recipe

one by two

By Madhu Raj

Take 0ne part boring hacker, two parts long legs of ex Miss Britain, ½ a cup of carbonated and stinking over-used story, add to that some finely chopped sub-plots from American sitcoms and shake super violently.

Before serving add some unusual Bollywood style Meet-No-Cute garnish.

…And you have your fizzler ready.

Remember that before preparing this mocktail you must select a hero who is relatable yet so unconnected with the audience. Also, the heroine must have taken dance classes which means that various respected simpatico artists would add some tang to this stinking mocktail.

Please ensure that you DO NOT add the cuteness or the intensity of a rom-com.

While making this mocktail you, just like the writer-director of this movie, you should gulp down tequila shots or smoke up to ensure that you remain unconnected with the reality.

The end result must be  an incontrovertible hangover just like this film.

The film has successfully been able to prove that Abhay- Preeti had just added their names to the long list of jinxed Bollywood couples who can’t figure out their chemistry on-screen. 

My rating: One by two stars (One shouldn’t keep soup ordering nomenclatures as film titles. It becomes so much easier for us to rate).

High point: Abhay Deol’s black eye protest. Wait, didn’t that happen way before this film’s release?

Low point: Pretty much everything else. Just like this picture below.

abhay deol1

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